Grief and Loss

How to deal with the loss of a loved one

Grief and loss is something that we will all have to deal with at some point in our lives. It is completely normal and natural to seek grief support or grief counseling. Unfortunately, a lot of us will be forced to grieve unexpectedly and will have to develop ways to cope.

Many people are familiar with Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. However, she herself emphasized that every loss is different and everyone’s grief is unique. You may or may not feel any of these complex emotions, and there is no telling how long any stage will (or should) last. The important thing is to deal with these issues and work through a grief recovery process.

• Step 1: The first thing that you must do is learn to accept your loss. A lot of people will not want to accept this, but it is completely healthy to have a proper understanding of death and realize that the person is physically gone. This understanding can be much more effective for dealing with grief than trying to ignore the fact that a loved one is gone.
• Step 2: This is one of the most important steps. The goal is to understand that it is okay to feel the pain. Denying the pain and trying to bottle it up can lead to a prolonged grieving period and possibly other serious medical conditions.
• Step 3: The next step is to learn to live without the person that you lost. The best thing to do is to change things in your daily life that may remind you of the person and may distract you. You obviously do not want to forget about them completely, but this is an effective method to help get you through the day and stay focused on your tasks.
• Step 4: Once you have completed the other steps successfully, you can now begin to move on with the rest of your life. It’s important to remember that the grieving process may take time and longer for certain people than others. This is why you should allow yourself the time necessary to get through these hard times and not try to rush through it.

Nothing can make the loss of a loved one easier to bear, but try to take comfort in the fact that death is a fact of life. Focus on the good times you had together and cherish those memories.